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Parenthood is so life changing that you almost don’t know what hit you. Raising a little one, whether they are babies, toddlers, pre-teens or teenagers is the most important and difficult job you will ever do. The MUM Life  consumes and becomes you.

I remember when I was a kid I would look at my parents and I thought they knew everything. I thought that had everything together. I had no idea the pressure and fear they must have felt every time I entered a new phase of life.  Now as a parent, I realise that no one knows what they are doing. Parenting is basically just winging it and hoping you raise happy, respectful kids. AND the scary part is that my son probably looks at me the same way and thinks I have all the answers.

This section of the blog is dedicated to all my fellow mothers. I don’t know what I am doing. I am learning as I go along. However here I will document what I have learnt along the way to hopefully help you. To give you hope and let you know that we are all in this together.

Helicopter Parenting : When You Should Speak Up And When You Should Shut It

As I browse around a lot of the parenting websites that I often frequent. The term ‘Helicopter Parenting’ has come up quite a lot. At first I thought the term was quite funny and more tongue in cheek about parents who can sometimes be a bit paranoid when it comes to their little darlings. However I quickly learnt that there was a lot more to it than that.

So what is helicopter parenting? The official meaning according to google is a parent who takes an overprotective or excessive interest in the life of their child or children. Said like this, I don’t see what the big issue is. In my view, how other parents wish to raise their kids has nothing to do with me or anyone else but the parents of that child. However Helicopter parenting has evolved somewhat, and is now seen as nosy parents intervening in the raising and/or discipline of other people’s children.

So when is it ok to helicopter parent? and is it ever ok?

I remember when I was in Paris, and I was walking down the street. Down one of the Parisian side streets was a man dragging a young boy down the road into a car while the little boy screamed to the high heavens. At first glance I assumed that the man was the child’s father and that the boy was just throwing a tantrum for some reason or another. I continued to walk until a heavy feeling appeared in my stomach. What if he wasn’t the father? What if I had just witnessed an abduction but had done nothing because I had assumed it was nothing. I felt conflicted.

What was the right thing to do in this situation ? If this was the child’s father and I came in to helicopter over the situation I was surely going to piss him off. And rightly so. I would probably be a bit annoyed if my son was throwing a mega tantrum and some random came over to question what I was doing. But what if there was something sinister happening? How would I live with myself if my fear of upsetting someone and being seen as a nosy bystander stopped me from helping a child in need.

On the other hand there is the extreme of helicopter parenting. I have heard of many a story from fellow mums about nosy do-gooders intervening in things they have no place to intervene. I have heard of a stranger calling the police on a mother that let her pre-teen 12-year-old daughter sit in the car while she ran into the store to buy milk. Or have seen others criticize other parents choice of wipes, toiletries and child snacks to the point of bullying.

So is it ok to helicopter parent?

Thanks to a handful of overzealous parents overstepping the mark there is now a stigma around speaking up when you truly feel you should. I can see both ends. I know as a mother, if someone took it upon themselves to helicopter my child and challenge my parenting choices I would see red. But on the other hand if my child was in trouble, I pray that someone would have the guts to helicopter the situation and help my son.

So should we helicopter parent? If the situation truly has you fearing for the child’s safety. Then HELLYes. It is worth possibly feeling embarrassed for 2 minutes than to realised you could have helped a child when they needed it and didn’t. But if you do not agree with another parents approach to parenting their child and there is no danger to the child. Then butt out! If a parent chooses to let their baby cry it out, go down the attachment parenting route or make their own parenting plan. It is NONE of your business!

There are too many stories of children getting hurt and nobody speaking up because they were scared to be seen as being a busy body. So lets stop helicopter parenting over trivial things, and encourage all of our fellow mummies and daddies to support each other no matter if you agree or disagree with their parenting method and speak up only when a child truly needs a voice!

Check out on my post on when my son burnt his hand under my supervision, despite being a vigilant parent.





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My Toddler Burnt His Hand On My Hair Straightener, And The Guilt Is Killing Me

I would like to think I am a very switched on mother. My son always comes first with everything, and I always make sure he is safe from harm. I walk into a situation and assess the surroundings to make sure there is nothing he can get his hands on. But despite my constant vigilance, my son still got hurt. My Toddler Burnt His Hand On My Hair Straightener, and the guilt is killing me.

Now that Gabriel is a toddler I feel like he is changing and growing every single day. Every day he seems to have learnt something new. Whether it is suddenly speaking new words, or showing off his sporty side by playing golf and kicking a ball around. Yes he plays golf. However fascinating it is to see them quickly learning, it can also be a challenge. They suddenly are able to do things you didn’t realise they could do.

It was all my fault

Toddler Burnt His Hand On My Hair Straightener

It was another Tuesday as normal and Gabriel and I were getting ready for playgroup. Usual routine. Get Gabriel dressed first, then quick shower while he plays in my room watching me get ready. We have done it a thousand times. And we will probably do it thousand times more. However this time ended up with me rushing to A & E in a panic as my son screamed in pain.

As I was getting ready I looked at myself in the mirror. My hair was a mess. I am sick of looking like a frumpy mum so I decided to style my hair. Gabriel was across the other side of the room playing with a book when I took my hair straightener out. I quickly straightened a few stray strands and then unplugged the straightener and put it in the middle of my bed to cool down, out of reach and view of Gabriel, or so I thought.

He didn’t let go!

Talking and singing to Gabriel while I quickly put on some makeup. I heard him scream. Strangely it was not the pain stricken scream I would have thought. It was a scream he does almost every single day, and at first reaction I thought he had just fallen over or gotten frustrated with his book. Peering out to see what the fuss was about I saw him with his hand on my hair straightener. Fingers right on the hot plates. SHIT!

He had burnt his fingers on the hot plate, and to make it worse he didn’t have the reaction to let the plates go. He held onto them while screaming, making the burn worse. Panic took over me as I tried desperately to keep his hand under cold water while he wriggled and kicked around. My Poor baby who was so happy just a few moments ago was now shaking his hand and crying in pain.

I hated myself for letting it happen

Heading to A & E, panic turned quickly to guilt and I hated myself so much for letting this happen. Were all the nurses going to look at me and deem me as an unfit mother and call child services? How could I have let this happen? How the hell did he get hold of it?

Luckily the plates had already significantly cooled down and he got away with just a bandage on his hand for a week. When we got home I couldn’t shake the guilt and the wonder of how he reached it. Sitting at home after the ordeal I looked up to see Gabriel playing with my phone. How did he get my phone? It was on the counter top! Realisation kicked in. He can reach the countertop, hence he can reach onto my bed. He had grown faster and taller than I had realised.

Moral of the story. No matter how vigilant you are or how good a mum you are. Your child can still get hurt. Don’t underestimate your kids. They are more resourceful than you can imagine. This mama has learnt her lesson the hard way.



Your child gets hurt under your supervision

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Toddler Tantrum: When your child throws a tantrum for no reason!

By Posted on 7 3 m read

So it finally happened. I am finally apart of the tantrum club. I have to admit that I didn’t think it would come around so quickly. But what can i say, my boy is gifted.  I have always sympathised with parents whose kids have gone into total meltdown, even though I found it extremely entertaining. It must be hard for them. However I don’t think I fully grasped how frustrating it is until it was my own kid.

Gabriel has always been a good tempered baby. As long as his tummy was full and he had his naps he was as good as gold. It was a breeze. If he ever got grumpy I knew what to do. But now my 15 month old baby has mistaken himself for a 15 year old teenager. He knows what he wants and isn’t afraid of letting me know that he is not impressed with my mummying skills.

Toddler Tantrum

The First Time

The first time it happen is was a day like any other day. He had his naps, had his snacks. He was a happy chappy. Around 5pm he came over and gave me sign that he wanted dinner. (We taught Gabriel sign language so he can tell us when he was hungry) It was a half an hour early but i was willing to make an exception. So I pop him in his highchair and warm up his food and get him ready for dinner. He is excited. I make sure it is not too hot and then i start feeding him. A few mouthfuls in he lets out a massive scream and nothing I do can stop him.

OH MY GOD! Whats wrong? Did I just burn my baby’s mouth? No. Was there something sharp in the food? Nope. Were the bits too big? No way. Did he want some water? None of the above.


I couldn’t find a reason

My son was hysterical and angry. He started throwing his water cup on the floor. Hit at my hands when I tried to comfort him and refused to eat anymore. I didn’t understand. He was hungry, and now he won’t eat. Why won’t he stop crying. A hour and a half later he finally stops  and then casually waddles off and starts laughing and smiling, while my stress levels have sky rocketed.  What the???? I am scared, What just happened?

I put him into bed and he happily goes to sleep like nothing happened. Did I give birth to Damien from the Omen? Puzzled and a bit weirded out, I leave it and hope it doesn’t happen again. Except it does.  Dinner time again, he is hungry but chucking a major angry fit. Then it happens. He stops and I realise what this is about. Apparently mummy isn’t shovelling the food into his mouth fast enough!!!!!!

Toddler Tantrum

Apparently I am just an asshole parent

It can’t be? He refused to eat! He was so worked up that he didn’t want anything. So I experiment the next few days to see if this is the case.  And sure enough, when I wait a bit between mouthfuls he goes into full meltdown. Hating on me because how dare I wait for him to chew before giving him the next spoonful.

This wasn’t the only meltdown I have been experiencing. Apparently I don’t do anything right. Won’t let him jump down the stairs, meltdown! Won’t let him run out onto the right. Total Meltdown! He eats all of this snacks and there are none left. Complete Meltdown. Changes his dirty nappy, How dare I? Don’t even mention my iPhone. Check out my post about my sons iPhone Obsession here

Keep Calm

So fellow mums and dads, I am now part of the club, I feel you. I am sorry I laughed. Tantrums are no laughing matter.

Take comfort in knowing this is only a phase. He is learning to deal with his emotions and it is necessary for his development. Keep calm, and if all else fails it is ok to leave him to cry a little if you feel you are on the edge.

Has your child ever freaked you out? Tell me your tantrum stories..


Toddler Tantrum


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Is my child eating too much? When your kid eats everybody else’s lunch

By Posted on 40 4 m read

We often hear about the struggle some parents have with their children who are fussy eaters. You just have to type fussy eater in google and almost a million results pop up. Fussy eaters tend to be every new parents worst nightmare. Who chooses to have a kid who refuses to eat anything but french fries? But what about the opposite? Is your child eating too much?

My partner and I both come from big eater families.  We love our food, maybe a little too much. I grew up in a culture where food was a way of life. My grandmother would slave away all day in the kitchen and we would all come together to bond over food. The more you ate the better it was in my family. ‘Eat’ my grandmother would say. ‘Eat, eat eat’. Even though I was already about to tumble over in a food coma.

” I was worried my child would be a fussy eater”

Is my child eating too much

So when my son was born, I was adamant that he was going to be a good eater and have a healthy relationship with food. I didn’t want a fussy eater. I wanted a healthy little boy who would enjoy eating broccoli. The thought of having a child that only wanted to eat junk terrified me. What would I do? How do you make someone eat when they don’t want to?

I wanted a child who would be happy with fruit for dessert and love his veggies. So I made sure that Gabriel was fed healthy food packed full of veggies. No dessert pots, just fruit. And I was delighted to see that he gobbled it up with no protest.

“The struggle wasn’t to get him to eat. The struggle was to stop him from eating”

What i didn’t realise was that Gabriel would just about gobble anything up that was edible. My fears of having a fussy eater quickly went out the window. The struggle wasn’t to get him to eat. The struggle was to stop him from eating. Today I was told at Nursery that he ate all of his lunch (no brainer there). However he also ate another kids lunch, plus the vegetarian option and a few pieces of toast that they make for the fussier kids. I didn’t know what to say. I couldn’t help but burst out laughing to be honest but apart of me felt like I needed to apologize.

Do you try to stop it? Or do you just accept that he eats a lot. To be perfectly honest I wasn’t bothered. He isn’t overweight for his age and he eats a very healthy and varied diet. But other peoples comments started to make me doubt myself.

On a playdate with a fellow mummy, my boy ran up to me holding a biscuit and saying TAAA. I opened it and gave it to him. The other mum was shocked and said “You let him eat snacks so close to dinner time”. The thing is, I don’t have to worry that he will not eat his dinner because he will eat it…..and mine….. and his fathers.

Is my child eating too much

“Is my child eating too much?”

But when I kept getting comments from people about his eating habits I felt like I was somehow mum failing again. So i decided to try and limit his food consumption. However he seriously seemed to outwit me at every move. He knows where the snacks are kept and regularly digs out a biscuit or rice cake. Even when I hide them he finds them! I once couldn’t find him anywhere and then found him inside the cupboard desperately trying to reach his snacks. So I stopped buying his snacks, only to have him start opening the fridge and bringing bananas to me to open.

He is very resourceful. My partner and I find ourselves trying to hide while we try to eat our breakfast (or anything we don’t want to share) but he always finds us. I don’t even know how on earth he knows that we are eating. He can tell at any given moment and he is quickly on the move to hunt us down. He is so resourceful that I took him swimming and put him in the play pen while I changed. When I came out he was eating a rice cake!!! Where the hell did he get a rice cake from? Turns out he had stolen it from another kid. Sorry!

” I accept he is a mini muncher”

So what do I do? Trying to limit his consumption wasn’t working and to be honest, it made me feel horrible having to say no to him all the time when he asked for food. So i decided to accept my son for what he is. A mini muncher.

The day he refuses to eat his dinner because he snacked too much will be the day I limit his consumption. But right now he is doing just fine. He is healthy and happy. Everything I could want for my child. So if you see me giving Gabriel snacks before dinner time, please don’t judge me.



Is my child eating too much

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Dealing With Living Far From Family

By Posted on 9 4 m read

Living far away from your family can be difficult for everyone no matter what stage of life you are in. However once you become a parent that absence becomes more obvious and difficult to bear.

I have aways been a very independent person. If I need to do something I will do it and will rarely ask anyone for help, even if I need it. That is just a part of who I am, something I am trying to improve but with some difficulty. However since becoming a mother I have found myself more than once wishing that I had my family closer. That I had the support that I needed at times of crisis. (Read my post about how Parenthood makes you appreciate your parents)

“There were times when I felt like I was going to break”

It is no secret that parenthood has its rewards and challenges. To the never-ending kisses you receive before bedtime, to the times I felt like I was at breaking point. I am the first person to say that if you choose to have a child then it is your responsibility to look after them and work your life around your child. I would never expect any one of our family members to take on that responsibility and commitment. They have their own lives to live however sometimes you just need that little extra support to help you get back on your feet.

There were times when I felt like I was going to break. Back when Gabriel was a few months old and he just wouldn’t stop crying. He was tired, probably overly tired. But despite him being tired he just would not sleep. I remember standing over the crib rocking him and patting him desperately trying to soothe my crying baby for what felt like hours.

The constant sound of the crying was sending me overboard until I finally cracked. For a split second I lost control of my temper. For a split second I wanted to scream and throw him across the room. It was only a split second. But that split second sent me into an emotional spiral of guilt. I left him to cry while I went to my room and cried myself.

At that moment. I needed my mum. I needed someone that understood me and that I knew wouldn’t judge me. Someone that would sweep in and help no questions asked and reassure me that I was not the worst mother on the planet. I needed my own family.

“I needed someone that understood me”

Having family nearby has its obvious perks(Babysitting and home cooked meals). But one thing that comes along with it is Family Influence. When I see Gabriel with his grandparents from my partners side. It is a lovely thing to watch. He loves his grandparents and he knows who they are and what they represent. He is growing up with the same influence his father grew up with. But what influence does he have from my side of the family?

living far away from your family

My partners side of the family are all very sporty. They love their sports and I can see this influence rubbing off on my son already. My side however are very musical, a trait that my partners side do not posses. My brother and I grew up with the Burmese culture and some of my most treasured memories are from our big family dinners with lots of traditional burmese food. Singing and sharing stories with all of my uncles, aunties and cousins. Music and food was the essence of my childhood. How do I give that essence to Gabriel when there is only one person around to represent it?

Steps to Survive

As difficult as it can be, i think the first step to surviving without your family is to remember why there is distance in the first place and to learn to accept it. Besides moving back to Australia there is nothing I can do to change it. And the reason I live so far is because I chose to live in Europe.The next step is to do everything you can to keep in touch with your family and implement their influence and culture. We are lucky that we live in a day when technology is at its best. I am able to video call my folks whenever possible, and though it is not the same as being face toface. My family get to see Gabriel as he grows up and learns new things.

And finally know that even though your family are not close by, you probably do have a lot people that are more the willing to help if you ask them.  I know that my partners family as well as some of my friends would have helped me if I had reached out. That was just my own pride getting in the way. Sometimes being away from your own family gives you the opportunity to become closer to others. Family doesn’t always mean blood. It is a bond that you can have with anyone if you are willing.


Dealing with living far away from family


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Parenthood makes you appreciate your parents

By Posted on 11 3 m read

As a child I never fully appreciated my parents. How could I ? I never truly understood the sacrifices they went through to have me. Everything was taken for granted. Don’t get me wrong I had respect for my parents but respect and appreciation are two different things in my view.

When I look back now at some of the things I pulled, I cringe. The days I faked a headache so that I could go home from school resulting in my mum or dad having to leave work to collect me. The times I would say ‘ Whats for dinner mum” as soon as she walked through the door after a long day at work. The automatic assumption that I would have clean clothes in the wardrobe . I really had no idea.

When mum would fall asleep on the couch my brother and I would roll our eyes. Whats wrong with you? You always fall asleep. Little did I know that I would be doing the exact same thing years down the line. It never crossed my mind how hard it can be to be a parent. How much they really sacrificed for me and my brother. Not until I become a mother myself.

I remember when Gabriel was born. The pure joy and unconditional love that took over me. The motherly drive to provide and nurture this child to the detriment of myself. Nothing else would ever be more important than him. I was willing to do anything to protect this child and give him the best in life. As I felt these emotions it dawned on me. This is how my parents feel about me.

This realisation is like having a lightbulb moment and very awkward moment at the same time. Everything that happened in your childhood seems to make sense. The reason why you were never allowed to go out late at night to join some of the other kids. The reasons why they were so strict. It is awkward to think that during all of these years I never got it.

I remember getting so angry with my mum because i didn’t understand why she was always worried. I would go out with friends she was worried. I would speak about boys she was worried. I would walk down the street to the shops, she would worry. It used to drive me crazy. I didn’t understand why someone would worry so much over seemingly mundane things. It was not like we lived in a war zone. But then I became her. I became the worried mother and I cannot help but laugh.

Now it is my turn. The child has grown and has now taken the place as the parent. Now I will be the one to watch as I try to shape my son into a respectable person only to have him resent me for it. I will be the strict uncool parent that will be viewed as the fun sponge. I will be the one running around in circles to make sure they have everything they need even though they won’t appreciate it yet.

Even though I know I have many years to go before Gabriel will one day appreciate what we do for him. I stand here ready to take on the challenge. My heart is filled with gratitude towards my parents.

Sorry I was such a little shit.

I now have my own little shit to raise.

Lets hope Karma is kind.


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