Sign up and get my FREE Modern Mum's Capsule Wardrobe Guide & Checklist. As well as exclusive promos, codes and post updates  

You are viewing Lifestyle

Things I Still Haven’t Learnt At 30

By Posted on 17 4 m read

I remember when I was little. I had just assumed that once you turned a certain age you officially became an adult. It was like a switch. Turn 21 and the knowledge of the world was bestowed to you and you would then be a reliable self sufficient human being. However as I got older I quickly realised that no matter what age I seemed to reach there were no revelations. That I was still the same goofy kid laughing at fart jokes at the age of 30. Even when I become a mum nothing changed. I just had a lot more responsibility. How can I raise another human being when I still feel like I have a lot to learn. But I realised that that is is part of the journey and now instead of trying to be the perfect adult I embrace my childishness. So here are my things I still haven’t learnt at 30 (technically I am 32 but……..shut up)

How to do things in moderation.

I have always been a bit of a pig as a kid. I blame it on our Asian upbringing where the more you ate the better. But even as an adult I cannot seem to shake the bingeing. I cannot eat just a handful of crisps, I need to eat the whole packet. Or I cannot just watch one episode on Netflix I need to finish the series. It is a trait that I had hoped to have lost as I grew older and wiser but apparently not….

Ate wayyy too much Wiener Schnitzel

 

 

How to wipe someone else’s bum without dry retching

I have been a mother for approximate 2 and a half years. You would think I would get used to the nappy changing and bum wipes by now. Especially when you have a son that averages about 4 turds a day. But I am not used to it. I very often have to fight the urge to vomit as I frantically try and wipe the mess away trying not to get it on my fingers. Who said motherhood was glamourous??

How to cook the right amount of rice/ pasta

I seriously thought that I would be the Australia/ Asian version of Betty Crocker by now. The amazing mum who knows how to cook up the perfect storm. But one trick that I can’t seem to master is the art of cooking to perfect amount of rice or pasta. I either cook too little leaving everyone wanting more. Or cook enough to feed my family plus the whole of Africa.

How to NOT burn my face, hand or other body part while styling my hair

If you follow me on facebook then you might remember my post about burning the whole side of my face with a curling iron. And trust me that was not the first time. I have burnt my forehead, cheek, hands and fingers and had marks on face that lasted over a year! But somehow I do not seem to learn and continue to curl my hair and burn myself. How do you all do it??

things I still haven't learnt at 30
Hair Curler 10, Kylie 0

How to understand directions like ‘Go west’ or “walk about 200 yards/metres”

When I ask for directions I want simple layman terms or for you to walk me there. However if you start using phrases like “go west” or ‘take a right turn in 200 yards”. chances are I am going to be lost forever. The worse part is that I will be too embarrassed to tell you I don’t know which way is west or I don’t know how far a yard is. And I will smile and nod like a understand while I am panicking like crazy in the inside.

How to have to will power to ‘get fit’

I often have the prep talk with myself. I think I have had it ever since I was born. Be healthy, go to the gym, get a six pack. I say it at every new year and on a lot of Mondays but one thing I have been consistent with is not doing it. I am yet to experience what it is like to have a six pack. And now will the baby weight still lingering I am not sure I will….I will start on Monday.

So there you have it. Even though I am technically an adult. That I am a mother and raising a little man (god help him). I still have not quite mastered the whole adulting thing. I am not the perfect picture of a mature lady. The perfect ‘in the box’ mother that I feel I am meant to be. I sometimes don’t even know how to be my own gender (cue in fart jokes and boy like behaviour). But I am ok with that. I am learning to be the perfect version of myself and that person is not perfect at all and you don’t have to be either.

Share this article

Why It Is Ok To Have A Bad Day

I am an avid believer that we, if we believe it, can achieve anything we put our minds too. I believe that through hard work and organisation we can achieve the work life balance we all crave. That we can achieve our goals all while being a good role model and parent to our children. However with that being said, I have never pretended it would be easy. There are days when I think that I have everything down pat. That I am doing pretty darn well at this parenting game. But then there are days like today where I just want to smash my head against a wall and hide under a rock. Hoping that the never ending ‘to do’ list will miraculously disappear and I will no longer have this pit in my stomach. Feeling guilty that my mind is not 100% focussed on my son. But while it sucks to have those days of self doubt and anxiety. It can sometimes be a blessing in disguise…a very good disguise. Here is why it is ok to have a bad day.

 

Why it is ok to have a bad day

 

Self Doubt is Only One Step Away From Self Improvement

 

A healthy amount of self doubt and criticism is not always a bad thing. Even though at the time it may feel like your life is falling apart and you cannot seem to do anything right. It can actually be a catalyst for some real personal growth and change. More often that not people who are able to question themselves and their abilities are more likely to succeed in life than those who believe they are always right. It shows a willingness to learn which can also turn into increased motivation to become the person you want to be. Remember Rome wasn’t built in a day

Before I started studying for my Marketing Qualification. The idea of having to study every day plus run my blog and look after my 2 year old seemed impossible. I seriously doubted my abilities. But I said to myself if other people can do it why can’t I? I used my self doubt as motivation to improve. So I sat down and wrote out a weekly schedule and then signed up for my course. A year later and I managed to get a distinction on my exam despite my previous worries.

Just remember that you and your journey is unique. Comparing your chapter one to someones else’s chapter 20 is a sure fire way to lose all self confidence. Use your self doubt as motivation to succeed and don’t let it get the better of you.

There is a lesson in every struggle

 

For every really bad day I have had. I can be sure that I have learnt something from it. Either about myself or about situations around me. I have learnt for example that if I don’t keep on top of the laundry everyday then at the end of the week it will be too much and I will blow a casket trying to get everything done at once. Or that my time and energy is better focussed around people who support and want the best for me. Than it is to be around toxic people.

When you feel like you are about to explode from sheer stress try and see the lesson in it. Why are you stressed? Is it your own doing? If yes what can you do to avoid a similar situation in the future. If not, then is it something you can control? Is it really worth the metal energy. I am a real worrier. Sometimes I worry and panic about the most mundane stupidest things ever. I am aware of this and when it happens I try to address it and find ways to let go of the anguish.

It’s A Sign You Need A Breather

There are times when just about anything will annoy me. Something that wouldn’t have phased me yesterday is really grinding my gears today. Yes it could be I am hormonal (damn you PMS). But it is usually my body’s way of telling me that I need a breather. So instead of charging through the day totally pissed off and risk being pissed off again tomorrow. Take a moment. Use it as a friendly reminder that you need a little me time. Even if it is just a hot cup of tea while sitting on the sofa for 5 minutes. Or lighting a candle and taking a nice bath. Take that moment for yourself to reflect and gather your thoughts.

Don’t forget to ask for help. If the kids are clinging to your leg and you are about to say something you regret. Its time for hubby to step in so you can take that breather in peace.

 

Life throws us so many curve balls that it is normal to sometimes feel like it is getting the better of you. But learning to channel the negative emotions in to positive outcomes can really help improve your everyday life as well as your mental well being. So give your self some slack and know that no one is perfect. Even if they pretend to be. Embrace that bad day and it might just turn in to a good one!

Check out my post on Morning habits for a productive day for more inspiration!

Would you like to join the Hot Like A Mother Community? Then sign up to my newsletter for exclusive content and download my FREE Modern Mums Capsule Wardrobe Checklist.

What it is ok to have a bad day

 

 

 

 

 

Share this article

Living The Smart Life With Hive

 

The idea of a Smart home has always been rather intriguing. I had images of living in a house that resembled The Jetsons where everything was robotic and you could switch everything on and off just by telling the house to do so. I had heard of Hive for the first time last winter when after spending a few weeks on the beach in Barbados. We arrived to a dark, freezing house that took 10 years to warm up. Complaining about it to a friend ( as you do) she said. ” Have you not heard of Hive? We control everything from our phone and put the heating on a few hours before we land”. What??? After having a look at their website i saw that they not only have smart heating devices but everything else from lightbulbs, door sensors, security cameras and even baby monitors.

So when I received an email from HIVE Home asking if I was interested in testing out some of their smart home products. I was thrilled!

I received a cute little gift box with a complimentary Active Light bulb, The Hive Hub, Hive Information Pack and some yummy treats!! Thank you Hive 🙂 You first need to register an account with your Hive Hub and then connect it to the Hive devices in your home. Once that is done, PRESTO you are set and can now make your home a smart home!

hive

The Active Light Bulb

I was interested to see what an active lightbulb does. It is basically a regular light bulb that can be set and controlled remotely from your phone. I was surprised at how easy it was to set up. I just screwed it into my lamp and that was it. It was so easy to use that even my toddler was able to figure it out when he got hold of my phone. Once it was ready I played with it using the app. I could change the dimness, glow, colour as well as schedule times for the light to come on and off. It wasn’t until I researched it a little more that I realised I could literally command my lights on through an amazon echo ( If i had one). OH MY GOD, I can have a Jetson house!

Pros

  • Midnight trips downstairs do not have to end with you on your face. Just tap the app and the light is on before you have even reached the room. This is perfect for me as when my husband is offshore, I do get a little scared in the dark. Don’t judge me! So being able to put the lights on before entering the room really helped.
  • At first I wasn’t sure what the point of having different colours was. However since playing around with it, it is proven to be a favourite for my 2 year old son. We can now turn the room blue and pretend to be swimming or change the colours around and have our own in house disco. I think this lightbulb would be a great highlight for children and we may just move to Gabriel room when he gets older.
  • Installation is completely idiot proof. If I could install it then seriously anybody could.
  • If you have Google Play or Amazon echo than your lights (any everything else Hive) can be controlled through a simple voice command.

Cons

  • Now I want to buy lightbulbs & spotlights for every fitting in my house as well as an amazon echo so i can command the lights on just from speaking but my husband won’t let me!

The Active Heating Thermostat

hive

After trying out the lightbulb and having the hub. I convinced my husband to change our thermostats to Hive. Our thermostats were long overdue an upgrade and I liked the reviews the Hive Active Heating Thermostat received. We bought 2 heating elements online (one for underfloor heating and one for radiators) and they arrived 2 days later. You have the option to install the thermostats yourself which is £100 cheaper. However we didn’t want to take any chance of mucking it up so we opted for the installation.

The Element made a huge difference to our heating. I could feel the house warm up straight away opposed to several hours, especially our underfloor heating. They have different settings depending on your preferences and energy requirements. As well as holiday mode to inform the device when you are away. The devices are aesthetically pleasing on our walls and I love that I can warm the house up before we arrive home with just a tap on my phone. Now I can relax in Dubai this November and be sure to arrive to a cosy home.

Pros

  • Turning the heating on and off and adjusting is so easy. I can also schedule heating times right from the app.
  • The Hive App tracks when you leave the house and when you are close to arriving home. This is great if you want to save on energy bills as it does not heat up unnecessarily.
  • Hive is a British Gas innovation and is installed by qualified British Gas engineers
  • The device ensures that the temperature never goes below 8°C thus protecting your pipes from frost.

Cons

  • It doesn’t seem to track our energy consumption throughout the devices which I think would be a good option.

hive

Verdict

I am really happy with our Hive Products and would definitely look at investing into more of the products in the future. Hive’s Customer Service is impeccable and I like that they are a British company compared to its rivals. If you are interested in converting your home into a smart home then check out their website https://www.hivehome.com for more information. Be quick as they are having a deal where if you buy a heating element you get a free Amazon Echo Dot. I am gutted as I didn’t get this option and I dying to command my lights on!!!!!

 

hive

This post includes Gifted Samples

Share this article

Top Fashion Picks


4 Ways To Make Friends In Adulthood

I remember the first moment I walked in to my very first baby class. I’d only been living in Aberdeen for a year and I was eager to meet some new people. I parked the car and anxiously walked up to the door with my changing bag and carseat in tow. Surely this should be easy right? We were all new mums with babies. We were all in the same boat. I walked in ready to practise my conversational skills after what felt like an eternity of baby talk. Only to find that I was a lot more awkward than I had thought. Conversation didn’t come easily and I was beginning to think I had not only lost my waistline. But my personality too. Making friends in Adulthood shouldn’t be hard, but it can at times feel worse than high school. I learnt the hard way. So here are ways to make friends in adulthood that has helped me through the years.

I came across this awkward feeling quite a few times during my adult life. Having moved from Australia to Switzerland, Switzerland to France and eventually France to Scotland. I have had my fair share of daunting and sometimes embarrassing moments whilst on the hunt for friends. The thing is that once you get over the fear of looking like an idiot or being rejected. It can come pretty naturally. All you have to do is push a few boundaries and bite the bullet. Even if you feel like a complete loser.

Making Friends in Adulthood

 

Get out and about

This may seem obvious but you will be surprised by how many people tell me they can’t make friends yet are constantly glued to their living room sofa. If you want to meet people and make friends then you need to get out. Join a sporting club or attend a local event or party. Either way get yourself out of the house. I made quite a few good friends through Facebook groups whilst in France and I know my husband met some of his now best friends through an expat football club. You need to make an effort. I know a few people who complain about not having friends but then never come out when asked.

Be bold

This story is one that was recounted numerous times with disbelief when I lived in Switzerland. Thankfully when i first moved to Switzerland I already knew a handful of people who took me under their wing. However most of them being boys, I craved a friendship that only girls can understand. So we were in a bar one day when I saw a group of girls sat talking at the bar amongst themselves. One of the girls had caught the attention of one of my friends. Wanting an excuse to talk to them and i used my friend as a cue to go start a conversation. I remember walking up to them and just sitting down and introducing myself. It turns out they were all from Brazil and spoke great english. Fast forward a few months and we were all inseparable and saw each other every week during the year and a half I lived in Switzerland!

Make a conscience effort

When I first moved to Aberdeen I found it really hard. Harder than anywhere else I had lived. Maybe it is because it is a small town. Or because people already have a tight group of friends since school years. But one thing was for sure. I had never felt more awkward in my life. My husband, who was just my boyfriend at the time was working offshore and I was stuck at home scrolling Facebook feeling extremely isolated. Sad isn’t it? So when one of our mutual friends invited me to her hen night. I jumped at the idea. It was a great excuse to get dressed up, have a drink and of course meet people. After meeting a few girls that night, I made a conscious effort not to let the opportunity pass me by. I added them on Facebook and then plucked up the courage to ask them if they wanted to meet for a coffee. They both said yes and now are two of my bestest friends. One of which was my maid of honour at my wedding!

Don’t force it

Last by not least, the best advice I can give is to not sabotage yourself by trying to be something you are not. When you try too hard to fit in and make some friends it usually does the opposite. People can tell if you are being fake straight away. Just relax, put your self out there and make a conscious effort. Be natural and true to yourself and hopefully you will make some rewarding friendships that last a lifetime.

 

Making Friends In Adulthood

 

 

 

 

 

Share this article

Goodbye Pads & Tampons, Hello Menstrual Cup

Women seem to have been dealt the short end of the stick when it comes to bodily changes and functions. Not only do we go through puberty earlier than boys. We are also burdened with the task of growing and birthing a child, menopause and of course our periods. As we get older we all become accustomed to our monthlies. But just because getting your period comes with the territory. It doesn’t mean that we need to suffer every month while ruining our best loved trousers and pants. So I recently made the switch to the Mooncup® menstrual cup and finally said goodbye to the dreaded pads and tampons. Here’s why

It Helps The Environment & Your Pockets

The Mooncup® menstrual cup is made from soft medical-grade silicone which is claimed to last as long as 5 – 10 years when looked after properly. Compare that to regular pads and tampons that not only can be used once but are often covered in plastic materials that cannot be recycled. Imagine the amount of pad and tampon waste we must be producing in the world. There is going to come a point where the earth cannot hide it anymore! Yuck!

The environmental factors alone were enough to intrigue me however the savings I made was a deal breaker. A Mooncup costs approximately £20 for a cup that can last up to 5 years, even 10 with good maintenance according to some websites. As I have endometriosis and suffer from intensely heavy periods. I easily spent between £15 to £20 per month on menstrual products. According to the Huffington Post the average woman in the UK spends approximately £13 on pads and tampons each month. And that does not include the extra cost of new underwear or trousers due to spillages.

It’s Great For both Light & Heavy Flows

I always had the dilemma of having to change from tampons to pads when my period was approaching the end. Which was a bummer as the pads would cause chaffing and just feel very unpleasant. However with the Mooncup it doesn’t matter how heavy you are. It holds 3 times more than a regular tampon and can be left in for 4-8 hours. So on my heaviest days when i usually had a few leakages I feel safe for longer and I rarely have any accidents. And on my lightest days I could carry on with my day with no discomfort at all.

They are super comfortable

There are times when I forget that I am wearing one or that I am even on my period. Something that never happened when I was using tampons and pads. The medical grade silicone is very soft and flexible making it really easy to fit to your body and doesn’t smell at all. At first I will admit I found it hard to wrap my head around. I had to cut the stem a few times to adjust it to my body and had to practise inserting it multiple times. However by the second month I had it down pat and never looked back. The only downside is that it can get messy when you are emptying the cup especially if you are in a public toilet. My advice is to carry some wipes to wipe the cup clean before reinserting and wash your hands thoroughly.

Useful Info

The cup comes in two sizes which are determined by your child bearing history and your age both of which can affect your pelvic floor tone. The size has nothing to do with your menstrual flow. Before the first use and after you have used the Mooncup you must sterilize it by boiling it in hot water for 5-7 minutes or by using a sterilizing agent.

The Mooncup® menstrual cup has really made my life a lot easier and I have found that I have suffered from a lot less cramps since using it. I truly recommend it to anyone who wants to feel more themselves when on their period. You can buy the cup at Boots or by clicking the links below. Visit their website for more info www.mooncup.co.uk

Hopefully you will join me by ditching the tampons and embracing the Mooncup!

This post contains a Press Sample

 

Shop The Post

menstrual cup

Share this article

Morning Habits For A Productive Day

Ugh…The dreaded mornings. I was never a morning person. I was and still am one of those people who loves their sleep. The one who hits the snooze button over a million times. Just to catch another minute or two of shut eye. When I was single and childless it wasn’t so bad. Getting ready in 20 minutes was easy if you knew what you were doing. But then I became a mum. Morning lie ins were no longer possible and I quickly found that if I wasn’t productive and organised in the mornings. Then my days were gone before I knew it and I felt like I had lost the day.

When you are a busy mum like myself, the morning routine can sometimes take its toll. Especially if your little ones were up during the night. However having good morning habits can not only boost your motivation. It can also set a positive pace for the rest of the day and help to reduce any stress or anxiety you may be feeling. So after 2 years of struggling to juggle everything. Here are my Morning Habits For A Productive Day.

Morning Habits For A Productive Day

Be the first to Wake Up

I admit this is something I still struggle with. Especially when my husband is home from offshore and when the weather is a bit drizzly. However as hard as it can be, waking up before my son and getting a few things done in the morning has been a life saver. The initial feeling of getting out of bed is the worst. However once you are out and dressed it actually feels somewhat therapeutic to have some quiet time to yourself. I use this time to get a workout done, reply to emails and drink my morning smoothie in peace. This calm start to the day puts me in a instant good mood and sets the precedent for the day.

Exercise in the morning

If you read my post on my belly donut dilemma then you know I am trying to get back into shape. But how do I find the time when my husband is offshore, I have a house to run, I am studying and I run a blog?! The only time and best time for me is in the mornings! I wake up and go down stairs to get a 30 min workout and shower before getting my son up and tackling the day. That way the workout and shower is done and I don’t have any excuses during the day to not workout. It has been proven that exercise can help to lift your mood and reduce stress. The rush of feel good endorphins just makes me ready to take on anything and there is no better time to feel motivated than in the morning.

Make the Bed & Get Dressed

This might sound daft but making the bed and getting dressed first thing in the morning can make a huge difference. For me it is like closure. I am dressed and my bed is made. So that means I am definitely not getting back in it and the day has officially begun. Getting dressed is especially important for me. Being a stay at home / work from home mum, it is super easy for me to laze around in my pj’s until late morning. However when I do this I find my motivation levels decrease and I feel more anxious and lazy with my appearance.

So now my outfit is prepared the night before ( which is usually my gym gear) and I get dressed as soon as I wake or have my shower. That not only prepares me for the day but also boosts my self confidence. Even if i am just staying in the house I will layout nice loungewear for the day ahead.

 

Healthy Breakfast

I love a fry up just like the next person. However I feel that when I eat a big unhealthy meal at breakfast it leaves me feeling sluggish and bloated. And can at times make me feel tired and lethargic. So I try and start my day with something light and healthy and leave the heavier things for a bit later. Especially now that I am working towards getting rid of the spare tyre, a healthy breakfast is a must. I love drinking my super green smoothie first thing in the morning and then follow it up about an hours later ( usually after my workout) with a bowl of fruit, gluten free granola and kefir or a veggie omelette. I find a breakfast that is full of healthy fibre and fruit aids my digestion and makes me feel more healthy and energised. Get my green smoothie recipe here

Make a Plan

Last but not least make a plan or list of all the things that you must do that day. When you have loads of things to do during your day like me it can feel overwhelming. Trying to wing it and not having some kind of structure to the day usually sets me up for failure. I end up being behind on my blog, study or feeling like I haven’t given my son enough quality time. It really helps to make a plan and compartmentalise the day by setting time for each task. That way you know first hand roughly how your day is going to be and can make sure that you have the right balance.<

Getting the right balance in life can be hard. But if you use your time effectively and incorporate some of these morning habits. Then you should be able to tackle each day productively!

Share this article