I remember when I was little. I had just assumed that once you turned a certain age you officially became an adult. It was like a switch. Turn 21 and the knowledge of the world was bestowed to you and you would then be a reliable self sufficient human being. However as I got older I quickly realised that no matter what age I seemed to reach there were no revelations. That I was still the same goofy kid laughing at fart jokes at the age of 30. Even when I become a mum nothing changed. I just had a lot more responsibility. How can I raise another human being when I still feel like I have a lot to learn. But I realised that that is is part of the journey and now instead of trying to be the perfect adult I embrace my childishness. So here are my things I still haven’t learnt at 30 (technically I am 32 but……..shut up)
How to do things in moderation.
I have always been a bit of a pig as a kid. I blame it on our Asian upbringing where the more you ate the better. But even as an adult I cannot seem to shake the bingeing. I cannot eat just a handful of crisps, I need to eat the whole packet. Or I cannot just watch one episode on Netflix I need to finish the series. It is a trait that I had hoped to have lost as I grew older and wiser but apparently not….
How to wipe someone else’s bum without dry retching
I have been a mother for approximate 2 and a half years. You would think I would get used to the nappy changing and bum wipes by now. Especially when you have a son that averages about 4 turds a day. But I am not used to it. I very often have to fight the urge to vomit as I frantically try and wipe the mess away trying not to get it on my fingers. Who said motherhood was glamourous??
How to cook the right amount of rice/ pasta
I seriously thought that I would be the Australia/ Asian version of Betty Crocker by now. The amazing mum who knows how to cook up the perfect storm. But one trick that I can’t seem to master is the art of cooking to perfect amount of rice or pasta. I either cook too little leaving everyone wanting more. Or cook enough to feed my family plus the whole of Africa.
How to NOT burn my face, hand or other body part while styling my hair
If you follow me on facebook then you might remember my post about burning the whole side of my face with a curling iron. And trust me that was not the first time. I have burnt my forehead, cheek, hands and fingers and had marks on face that lasted over a year! But somehow I do not seem to learn and continue to curl my hair and burn myself. How do you all do it??
How to understand directions like ‘Go west’ or “walk about 200 yards/metres”
When I ask for directions I want simple layman terms or for you to walk me there. However if you start using phrases like “go west” or ‘take a right turn in 200 yards”. chances are I am going to be lost forever. The worse part is that I will be too embarrassed to tell you I don’t know which way is west or I don’t know how far a yard is. And I will smile and nod like a understand while I am panicking like crazy in the inside.
How to have to will power to ‘get fit’
I often have the prep talk with myself. I think I have had it ever since I was born. Be healthy, go to the gym, get a six pack. I say it at every new year and on a lot of Mondays but one thing I have been consistent with is not doing it. I am yet to experience what it is like to have a six pack. And now will the baby weight still lingering I am not sure I will….I will start on Monday.
So there you have it. Even though I am technically an adult. That I am a mother and raising a little man (god help him). I still have not quite mastered the whole adulting thing. I am not the perfect picture of a mature lady. The perfect ‘in the box’ mother that I feel I am meant to be. I sometimes don’t even know how to be my own gender (cue in fart jokes and boy like behaviour). But I am ok with that. I am learning to be the perfect version of myself and that person is not perfect at all and you don’t have to be either.