
Why It Is Ok To Have A Bad Day
I am an avid believer that we, if we believe it, can achieve anything we put our minds too. I believe that through hard work and organisation we can achieve the work life balance we all crave. That we can achieve our goals all while being a good role model and parent to our children. However with that being said, I have never pretended it would be easy. There are days when I think that I have everything down pat. That I am doing pretty darn well at this parenting game. But then there are days like today where I just want to smash my head against a wall and hide under a rock. Hoping that the never ending ‘to do’ list will miraculously disappear and I will no longer have this pit in my stomach. Feeling guilty that my mind is not 100% focussed on my son. But while it sucks to have those days of self doubt and anxiety. It can sometimes be a blessing in disguise…a very good disguise. Here is why it is ok to have a bad day.
Self Doubt is Only One Step Away From Self Improvement
A healthy amount of self doubt and criticism is not always a bad thing. Even though at the time it may feel like your life is falling apart and you cannot seem to do anything right. It can actually be a catalyst for some real personal growth and change. More often that not people who are able to question themselves and their abilities are more likely to succeed in life than those who believe they are always right. It shows a willingness to learn which can also turn into increased motivation to become the person you want to be. Remember Rome wasn’t built in a day
Before I started studying for my Marketing Qualification. The idea of having to study every day plus run my blog and look after my 2 year old seemed impossible. I seriously doubted my abilities. But I said to myself if other people can do it why can’t I? I used my self doubt as motivation to improve. So I sat down and wrote out a weekly schedule and then signed up for my course. A year later and I managed to get a distinction on my exam despite my previous worries.
Just remember that you and your journey is unique. Comparing your chapter one to someones else’s chapter 20 is a sure fire way to lose all self confidence. Use your self doubt as motivation to succeed and don’t let it get the better of you.
There is a lesson in every struggle
For every really bad day I have had. I can be sure that I have learnt something from it. Either about myself or about situations around me. I have learnt for example that if I don’t keep on top of the laundry everyday then at the end of the week it will be too much and I will blow a casket trying to get everything done at once. Or that my time and energy is better focussed around people who support and want the best for me. Than it is to be around toxic people.
When you feel like you are about to explode from sheer stress try and see the lesson in it. Why are you stressed? Is it your own doing? If yes what can you do to avoid a similar situation in the future. If not, then is it something you can control? Is it really worth the metal energy. I am a real worrier. Sometimes I worry and panic about the most mundane stupidest things ever. I am aware of this and when it happens I try to address it and find ways to let go of the anguish.
It’s A Sign You Need A Breather
There are times when just about anything will annoy me. Something that wouldn’t have phased me yesterday is really grinding my gears today. Yes it could be I am hormonal (damn you PMS). But it is usually my body’s way of telling me that I need a breather. So instead of charging through the day totally pissed off and risk being pissed off again tomorrow. Take a moment. Use it as a friendly reminder that you need a little me time. Even if it is just a hot cup of tea while sitting on the sofa for 5 minutes. Or lighting a candle and taking a nice bath. Take that moment for yourself to reflect and gather your thoughts.
Don’t forget to ask for help. If the kids are clinging to your leg and you are about to say something you regret. Its time for hubby to step in so you can take that breather in peace.
Life throws us so many curve balls that it is normal to sometimes feel like it is getting the better of you. But learning to channel the negative emotions in to positive outcomes can really help improve your everyday life as well as your mental well being. So give your self some slack and know that no one is perfect. Even if they pretend to be. Embrace that bad day and it might just turn in to a good one!
Check out my post on Morning habits for a productive day for more inspiration!
mommyjheng
I agree to this. At one point to another we experienced having a bad day. It really depends on how we deal with it. Same like you, I usually take a break by just sitting and have a cup of coffee. Worrying too much sometimes lead you to stress and burnout. We really need to breathe and do things one step at a time.
Kylie Abreu
Yes I agree. A good cuppa can do wonders 🙂
Jessica
It is important to remember there is a lesson in tough or stressful situations. So hard to remember though when you are in the moment. I’m laughing about your laundry reference because I currently have piles of it upstairs that need to be folded!
Kylie Abreu
Hahaha I hate folding laundry. If I can put it off I will but then I just end up stressed at the mountain I have created
KrisBeeMama
I love the idea of using your self doubt as motivation! Thanks for the encouraging article!
Kylie Abreu
Thank you so much Krisbeemama. Glad you liked it
Sarah
Agreed! I have gotten better over the years at controlling my stress, and taking a breather is definitely a helpful tip. If your already stressed, a bad day can send you spiralling. It’s good to take time, step back, and breathe! Then as you said, with time, you can learn from it.
Kylie Abreu
Yes when you re already stressed and something else happens it can get ugly for sure.
Christine
I love this post and need to hear this more often. Bad days are bound to creep up. I also believe that there is a lesson to be learned in just about anything and sometimes we need to just slow down and take a break. “Mama said there’ll be days like this…” 😉
Kylie Abreu
Thank you. You are so right. I believe that there is a lesson in everything too
Sedistyles
“Channel negative emotions in a positive way” I love this!
Kylie Abreu
Aw thank you!
togetherishmom
I love this. The other day I had quite a day and I kind of let myself wallow in it for a few before moving on. This resonated with me. <3
Kylie Abreu
I am so glad it resonated.We all have those days and some days are harder to pick ourselves up than others. But it is possible
Autumn - Simply Amazing Living
I concur. We are not perfect but it seems like most of us are trying to be. Gotta take the good with the bad.
Kylie Abreu
I think we can try to live our best life without trying to be perfect. Perfect is unattainable
happilyeverdeb
I love this post so much because I can totally relate all of its essence. Some times you just got to give yourself a break.
Kylie Abreu
Thank you, I am so glad you can relate. We totally need to learn to give ourselves some slack
mary yowell
I don’t have kids but I could use this in everyday life as well. This was a great reminder to practice these things!
Kylie Abreu
Definitely, I think it is useful for all aspects and stages of life. Mum, student, elderly …whatever
Mad Mommy
Every one has bad days. It’s time for us to accept it.
Kylie Abreu
Yes, thats true
Reese
I definitely agree that sometimes self-doubt can be constructively channeled into self-growth, when you don’t get trapped in the comparison game. People find inspiration and success at all different points in their lives and I find it helpful to reflect on stories of people who discovered their calling later in life because they chose to keep moving forward and dreaming.
Kylie Abreu
Yes the comparison game can be a big trap for some people. I also find it helpful to hear how people have succeeded because of their pure will
Amber @ xoxo, Am
Great post babe! I definitely agree that a lesson can come out of struggles!
Kylie Abreu
Thank you so much Amber
Han Armstrong
This was a post that I really needed to read – I’m known for really getting annoyed when I have a bad day, but this really helped! x
Han | lifewithhan.blog
Kylie Abreu
Aw thank you! Glad it helped x
leila2808
I couldn’t agree more! Thanks for sharing.
Rosie (@greenrosielife)
This is all so true – we are under such pressure to appear to have perfect lives but the reality is often rather different. I think of all of these points, taking a breather is the one we find hardest.
Emily Leary
I am in agreement with all of this. Bad days seem to be your brain and body telling you to have a break, slow down, breathe!
Kylie Abreu
Thank you for your comment Emily! So glad you agree! I really think we should take it as a sign that me just need a break x