I am an avid believer that we, if we believe it, can achieve anything we put our minds too. I believe that through hard work and organisation we can achieve the work life balance we all crave. That we can achieve our goals all while being a good role model and parent to our children. However with that being said, I have never pretended it would be easy. There are days when I think that I have everything down pat. That I am doing pretty darn well at this parenting game. But then there are days like today where I just want to smash my head against a wall and hide under a rock. Hoping that the never ending ‘to do’ list will miraculously disappear and I will no longer have this pit in my stomach. Feeling guilty that my mind is not 100% focussed on my son. But while it sucks to have those days of self doubt and anxiety. It can sometimes be a blessing in disguise…a very good disguise. Here is why it is ok to have a bad day.
Self Doubt is Only One Step Away From Self Improvement
A healthy amount of self doubt and criticism is not always a bad thing. Even though at the time it may feel like your life is falling apart and you cannot seem to do anything right. It can actually be a catalyst for some real personal growth and change. More often that not people who are able to question themselves and their abilities are more likely to succeed in life than those who believe they are always right. It shows a willingness to learn which can also turn into increased motivation to become the person you want to be. Remember Rome wasn’t built in a day
Before I started studying for my Marketing Qualification. The idea of having to study every day plus run my blog and look after my 2 year old seemed impossible. I seriously doubted my abilities. But I said to myself if other people can do it why can’t I? I used my self doubt as motivation to improve. So I sat down and wrote out a weekly schedule and then signed up for my course. A year later and I managed to get a distinction on my exam despite my previous worries.
Just remember that you and your journey is unique. Comparing your chapter one to someones else’s chapter 20 is a sure fire way to lose all self confidence. Use your self doubt as motivation to succeed and don’t let it get the better of you.
There is a lesson in every struggle
For every really bad day I have had. I can be sure that I have learnt something from it. Either about myself or about situations around me. I have learnt for example that if I don’t keep on top of the laundry everyday then at the end of the week it will be too much and I will blow a casket trying to get everything done at once. Or that my time and energy is better focussed around people who support and want the best for me. Than it is to be around toxic people.
When you feel like you are about to explode from sheer stress try and see the lesson in it. Why are you stressed? Is it your own doing? If yes what can you do to avoid a similar situation in the future. If not, then is it something you can control? Is it really worth the metal energy. I am a real worrier. Sometimes I worry and panic about the most mundane stupidest things ever. I am aware of this and when it happens I try to address it and find ways to let go of the anguish.
It’s A Sign You Need A Breather
There are times when just about anything will annoy me. Something that wouldn’t have phased me yesterday is really grinding my gears today. Yes it could be I am hormonal (damn you PMS). But it is usually my body’s way of telling me that I need a breather. So instead of charging through the day totally pissed off and risk being pissed off again tomorrow. Take a moment. Use it as a friendly reminder that you need a little me time. Even if it is just a hot cup of tea while sitting on the sofa for 5 minutes. Or lighting a candle and taking a nice bath. Take that moment for yourself to reflect and gather your thoughts.
Don’t forget to ask for help. If the kids are clinging to your leg and you are about to say something you regret. Its time for hubby to step in so you can take that breather in peace.
Life throws us so many curve balls that it is normal to sometimes feel like it is getting the better of you. But learning to channel the negative emotions in to positive outcomes can really help improve your everyday life as well as your mental well being. So give your self some slack and know that no one is perfect. Even if they pretend to be. Embrace that bad day and it might just turn in to a good one!