Why Am I Ashamed to be a Blogger?
On a night out at a comedy club last weekend, the host was engaging with the audience around him, looking for someone to pick on. Sitting at the very front of the stage, I was an easy target. (It was my hen do for gods sakes I was an easy target for anything that weekend). Thankfully he started on other people that were closer to the stage but I knew it was a matter of time. As he talked and asked questions to the audience and poking fun at them I froze. Oh god! He is going to ask me what I do for a living?
Why am I ashamed to be a blogger?
You see I do not have a conventional job per se, though there are some that make a lot more money doing what I do than others in “conventional” jobs. In fact I work my butt off everyday to be able to one day be one of those people. But yet I am embarrassed. I am scared of what people are going to think. I am scared of being judged. What do I do? I am a blogger.
I have always been an ambitious person. The best advice I have ever gotten from someone was ‘Don’t rely on anyone else to look after you’. And that was what I did. I left Australia at the tender age of 19 and never looked back. I built a life and career from scratch all by myself, in a non-english speaking country and I am damn proud of that! But things changed.
I made the decision to follow my partner back to his hometown in Scotland which is predominantly run by the oil and gas sector. A beautiful country but career suicide for someone who works in the Fashion Industry. I can build a life and career again, I have done it before. I said feeling optimistic. And then I fell pregnant.
Made me feel like I was making a difference
Suffering from severe nausea I was forced to give up the job I had landed just as the oil and gas market plummeted. So I become a stay at home mum. The city that was once full of job opportunities had nothing to offer anymore. And people from difference sectors like myself were doomed. With my partner working offshore every month, my priority became my son and my life was consumed with baby. Check out my post about my struggle with PostPartum Healthy Anxiety
I love being a mum, but some people like me dream of more. Having always been independent I struggled with this new life. I used to want to conquer the world, but now I felt like my dreams were just far fetched fantasies. I had to do something. So to help me keep my feelings of inadequacy at bay I started blogging. It wasn’t much but it made me feel like a had a job again. Like I was working towards something. It was just a little piece of me that I could hold on to and make me feel like I was making a difference, even if it was small.
I could already see them rolling their eyes at me
So when my blog took off unexpectedly in January, I was stunned. I couldn’t believe that anybody was bothered to look at or read what I had to say. But it continued to grow. Could I actually do this full time? Could I make a job out of this? After doing some research I saw that lots of people make a living out of blogging and I felt a drive in me that I had not felt in a long time. So I started to take my blog a little more seriously.
Even though I was working a lot of hours, researching, writing and studying to understand this new world. Whenever someone would ask me what I did or if I was going back to work. I stumbled. How can I tell these people I am a blogger. They will laugh. I could already see them rolling their eyes at me, but why?
Society can be very judgemental
The thing is with blogging, is that people do not appreciate how much work actually goes into it. People see a few blog posts pop up a few times a week and they think it is just a small hobby you do when you have a bit of spare time. They don’t realise you spend hours a day brainstorming ideas, writing and editing photos. They don’t see that you have to learn about SEO, Web Coding and Online Marketing in order for your blog to be seen or to resemble something.
People just think you are sitting behind a computer ranting and posing for selfies. So I felt embarrassed to tell people what I was doing that I preferred to say I was a stay at home mum then to actually tell people that I’m a blogger. My feelings of inadequacy had taken over me causing me to feel ashamed of something I shouldn’t be. But I couldn’t help it. Society can be very judgemental and I didn’t want to be at the end of the judgement stick. What I didn’t realise was that by not standing up as a blogger I was contributing to this judgement and consequently letting myself and my fellow bloggers down.
They don’t realise you spend hours a day brainstorming
As difficult as it is I have decided to practise what I preach. I started this blog to give myself meaning and encourage myself and others to be confident in who they are. Regardless of what stage of life you’re are in. No matter what race, gender or sexual orientation. No matter what you do! (Hence the name ConfidentlyKylie, Get it?)
So for myself and for all my fellow bloggers, I refuse to be scared of what others may think. I won’t sit back and undermine the hard work we do. So the next time someone asks me what I do. I will be brave enough to say I am a blogger.
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This really resonates with me, thank you… I’m a Marketing Manager & I blog as a hobby although I originally started it in a paid role as a student blogger for my uni (so there’s mention of it on my CV). In a recent interview I was asked about my blog but I played it down as I felt embarrassed that my little side activity might be perceived as valuable to an employer. I didn’t get the job and on asking for feedback, one of the things they highlighted was that I should have talked more about the experience I’ve gained from maintaining a blog for nearly 2 years. Blew my mind that they saw as much importance in that as they did some of my other marketing skills. So no more feeling embarrassed – for me or for you. Time to embrace the skills and experience that blogging gives you and the value that is held in those.
Aw wow! Don’t be hard on yourself as I would have done the exact same thing. I never would have thought that people would want to know about it in a job interview. Just goes to show! Agreed. Lets be proud to be bloggers 🙂
soo I love this post because it is so accurate. I feel literally the same way! Why am I so embarrassed to tell people that I have a blog? I’m usually really confident about everything.
I feel like it’s partly because every girl starts a blog…and then posts one thing, and then leaves it forever. So a lot of people don’t take you seriously when you say it’s something you want to do.
Thank you. That could be it as well, it is seen as just a casual thing to do. I am glad to see i am not the only one to feel this way 🙂
Girl, I feel you. Sometimes I don’t like to tell people I’m a “blogger” – I think it’s because this realm is so saturated, and people don’t realize how much WORK goes into creating quality content, branding yourself, and really growing your audience. Keep doing you. <3
I totally agree! We need to be confident though, easier said than done I know 🙂
Blogging still doesn’t make it as a “real” job in a lot of people’s books. Heck, people even raise their eyebrows when I tell them I write for money! (You know, that look that clearly says, “Why on earth would someone pay you to write?”
But once you get it across to them that it’s a lot more than just throwing some words down on paper and writing about what you had for dinner, they get it. Especially when you get it across to them how much value blogs can have from a marketing perspective.
I know that look. Makes me cringe every time. I get what you are saying but it can be exhausting trying to explain it all the time. X
Oh my goodness I totally get this! I still tell people that I blog, but I see the look on their faces and how they quickly change the subject, and I’m only doing this as more of a hobby!
Cassie @ Be Forever Healthier
This blog is so true! I’m with you though, it’s time to own it and stop being embarrassed. I love being a blogger and I work probably harder than most people in traditional jobs. My problem is everyone assumes I sit around all day and do nothing but it couldn’t be further for the truth! Thanks for sharing 🙂
Thank you so much for sharing this! I have to say, I am very guilty about this as well when ask what I do. Thank you for letting me know that Im not the only one who has these moments.
Aw no probs. I am also glad to know that I am not the only one 😊
Although blogging is not my profession, I did feel kind of the same way when I was telling the people in my life that I was interested in starting a blog and wanting to eventually make it my job. I had some people be supportive of me but others kinda scoffed at me. It’s kinda sad but I don’t let that discourage me. I love doing it and think that people with that negative energy will eventually fade out of my life ! 🙂
You have the right attitude. No one needs toxic people in your life and if you can’t be support then bye bye. X
Hi Kylie! I totally can relate to this! I work another job in addition to blogging and sometimes am embarrassed to talk about my blog with others. I think it’s because blogs are so personal and sometimes I talk about things that I wouldn’t bring up in a day to day conversation. I love that you’re so out in the open in talking about these topics!
Have a great Tuesday! xx
Aw thanks Hayley! That is very true. The stuff I write about i wouldn’t jump in to conversation about. Have a great day too x
Amy - The Printables Club
I just found your post through Pinterest because I am exactly the same when people ask what I do – most people don’t get it. I’m also in Aberdeen. There is a great bloggers group called abzmeet bloggers on Facebook for Aberdeen bloggers. They meet up regularly. I make it along once in a blue moon.
Hi Amy! Cool another aberdeen blogger! I know people don’t get it at all. That is great. I will look it up. Would be great to meet fellow bloggers x
i totally relate to this! I kept my blog a secret from my friends and family for so long for fear of being judged and then one day i decided if they aren’t going to support me that’s on them, not me! i do work a job as well at the moment (my blog hasnt quite taken off yet) and i still have not mentioned it to my coworkers! Thanks for sharing! xo
Hey Ashley. I know, It is hard not to feel self conscious about it. I still don’t know what to say when people ask me but we need to be confident about it. Hopefully with time people will understand that blogging can be a job x
Hey Kylie. Finally I don’t feel alone or like I’m crazy. My guess is that this kind of work isn’t the norm and that’s why we feel shameful about it.
Hopefully as it becomes more and more common people can stop looking down on it and actually appreciate the amount of work that goes into it as you said.
Yes Hopefully it won’t be so looked down upon. Us bloggers need to stick together to make it normal 🙂
You go girl! I feel weird actually telling people I’m a blogger, too. Thanks for writing this post to inspire people like me to be proud of being a part of the PHENOMENAL, friendly & supportive blogging community.
Thank you lovely!
Hey krista, just checked out your website – looks like you’re doing awesome! Thanks for the breakdown like by line of how you’re making it happen!
Kylie! I love this post. Of course it answered exactly what I googled: “ashamed to have a blog” haha! On one hand I am so excited about what I have created because it is so authentic, and on the other, I’m so afraid to tell people. Unless I’m successful – then I’ll tell people.
The message: as long as I’m successful, it’s okay to be authentic, and if I’m not successful, my authenticity is something to be ashamed of.
Ouch. Yikes. Holy shit. I didn’t really see that so clearly before. What a wonderful opportunity for me to question that extremely unhelpful belief.
Thank you for your post!